Simple Advice for the Chaotic Life
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I can still remember that phone call with my parents when I called to let them know that I was going to move abroad. My parents’ response was something like, “ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?!?” I remember calmly responding, assuring them that I had indeed thought this through, and no, I was not off my rocker. They remained unconvinced. They were shocked, more shocked than I was that I was indeed going through with this.
I had always been a homebody and loved my parents dearly. Most weekends in college I would drive back to my hometown just to be with my family, preferring to spend a restful weekend with them rather than partying with my friends. Sure, I had traveled overseas before, but never had I done something wild like this, and all because I was in love.
I had been in love before, and had suffered much heartbreak, as a result. But this guy was different, and being close to my mid twenties, I knew myself a lot better this time. Besides, I didn’t know what the hell I was doing with my life, and this guy was quickly becoming the only grounding certainty I had.
All throughout high school and college, I had planned to go to medical school. I took all the intense science courses, took the necessary tests, visited all the schools, you name it. But I knew in my heart that medicine was far from what I wanted. I delayed applying to medical schools after graduation from college, and spent the first year out of college doing odd jobs: freelance work, volunteering, working at an elementary school, and nannying. It was a boring chapter of my life, far from what I had envisioned my future, exciting life to be growing up.
When my old flame from my college internship overseas in Australia decided to plant himself again in my life, things began to quickly turn around. I’ll admit that all of my do-over relationships before him had NEVER worked out, no matter how many times I ‘tried again’ with someone. But this time was different. We were two years older than when we had first met and dated in Australia, and the reason we had broken it off was simple: long distance can’t work. Or can it?
Turns out, long distance relationships can definitely work. And ultimately, deciding to end the long distance relationship component by moving overseas to be with this person was one of the best decisions I ever made for myself, and my life. Was I scared? Yes. Was I absolutely certain it would work out? F*ck no. Would I do it again? Without a doubt.
Living overseas in Australia with my boyfriend, turned fiancé, and now husband transformed my life. I learned things about myself that I never knew before. I found that I actually liked taking risks, trying new things, immersing myself in other cultures, and not always having all the answers.
It was the chapter of my life where I finally realized that I was in control of my own life, that I could make my own decisions, and yes, I would be ok.
Since moving back to the US with my husband, we still remember our chapter overseas as one of the best in our relationship. By having to rely so much on just one person, and being so far away from all that was familiar to me, I learned to not only trust and love my husband, but also myself. I made a lot of mistakes (e.g., driving on the wrong side of the road there), but I learned from every experience, experiences that have continued to shape me into the person I am today. And after all, isn’t that what life is all about?
