Please note that this post contains affiliate links. For more information, see my disclosures here.
When life gets tough, you’ve probably been told to just “roll with the punches.”
But what about when life just keeps decking you, and getting slugged again and again no matter what you do just seems, well, unavoidable?
I can remember feeling like this in college at one point.
My love life was in shambles, having just been broken up with by my boyfriend.
My home life wasn’t much better, as my roommate and I were on the outs.
I was at a crossroads trying to decide if I really did want to attend medical school post graduation.
And to top it all off, I had just been diagnosed with mononucleosis.
It seemed like no matter what I did, everything just kept falling to pieces, and the harder I tried, the worse things became.
I learned a lot during this time period, mostly what not to do when life throws you punches.
The worst thing you can do when life gets challenging is to resist the change, and try to maintain control over things you simply have no power over.
That being said, there are a few things you can do differently when life delivers one crushing blow after another.
So what do you do if life keeps knocking you down? Get back up and try again, and use these 9 tips to roll with life’s punches.
How to Roll with the Punches When Life Decks You
1. Focus on what you can control. The vast majority of life’s events are well beyond our control, so it’s futile to hyper focus on what you simply cannot change. However, there is one thing that you can exert full control over: you and your reaction. When life slugs you and knocks you down, how will you respond? What will you do differently? Will you try again? Focus on what you can control, and you’ll find that you actually have far more power than you realize.
2. Zoom out and look at the bigger picture. When we’re really stuck in the middle of a problem or challenge, it’s all too easy to become mired in the details, and to lose sight of what really matters. The next time you’re feeling stuck, zoom out and look at the bigger picture. Is what you’re dealing with really that bad in the grand scheme of things? More than likely, many of the challenges you’re facing currently will be mere blips on the radar one day. Try to keep a healthy perspective as you tackle your problems; this is absolutely key in rolling with life’s punches.
3. Lean on your support system. When you’re faced with one bad day after the next, and problem after problem, it may start to feel like you’re stuck on a lonely island of misery and isolation. Don’t get trapped in this mindset – your family and friends are here for this very reason. Meet up with some friends for a drink after work, or visit with your family this weekend. Not only will they be a source of comfort, but they may also have some seasoned advice to lend you.
4. Follow your intuition. Since the time of our ancestors long ago, humans were greatly dependent on their natural instincts for survival. Though our lives differ drastically from theirs today, humans are still an instinctually wired species, with an intuition that can warn us against danger, while also providing us with an inherent feeling of what’s right or wrong, or good and bad. We have instincts for a reason, so use them! If you’re stuck at a crossroads, ask yourself: “What is my gut telling me?” Follow your intuition. It’s there, but you have to listen.
5. Find the lesson in the challenge. Problems and challenges often have a negative connotation. We may view them as major setbacks, or problems that are getting in “the way,” rather than looking at them as valuable life lessons. The next time you come up against a challenge, don’t let yourself be deterred by the negativity of a perceived problem. Instead, embrace the challenge and look hard to find the lesson within it. Not only will this give you a healthier, more positive mindset to tackle the challenge with, but you’ll also be that much stronger and wiser if you can actually learn from the experience.
6. Forget the negatives and focus on what’s positive. So maybe you had the worst day ever at work. Or maybe you’ve had the worst week of your life where you broke up with your partner and they’re in the midst of moving out, and your dream job has turned into more of a nightmare. When life slams us with one sh*tty even after another, negative emotions like anger, frustration, and bitterness hardly seem like a choice. Rather than letting emotions like these control you though, establish control over them by choosing to focus on what is good in your life. So you broke up with your partner and they’re moving out? Well, now you can let your neat freak flag fly and keep your place as spotless as you want. So your job has gone to hell in a handbasket? Now you have the motivation to apply for that other job. Clear away the negatives in your mind, and leave room for just the positives.
7. Stay proactive. When life delivers one blow after another, it’s all too easy to let ourselves become paralyzed by the problems, and victims of crippling, free-floating anxiety. Don’t let yourself feel powerless to life’s punches, and roll with them by staying proactive. Keep yourself busy and on top of the challenges. Look for the solutions, not additional problems.
8. Take care of yourself. The last thing you need when you’re dealing with life’s highs and lows is to fall ill. Take care of your health. A healthy body nourishes a healthy mind and spirit. Go on a walk. Drink plenty of water. Take time to decompress by reading a book, journaling, or whatever brings you joy.
9. And remember: time heals all. When it seems like there aren’t enough hours in the day, or that life is throwing too much at us in too short of a time span, time may seem like our secret enemy. Time, however, can be your best friend when it comes to rolling with the punches in life. Whether you just got broken up with, or you’re in between jobs, or on the outs with your best friend, time is capable of healing all wounds. Time softens the harshest blows, and massages even the worst of pains. Take care of yourself and focus on what you can control, and let time take care of the rest.
