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If life was a theme park, then relationships would be the tallest, scariest emotional roller coaster of all time.
From the incredible highs of joy, love, and passion, to the dropping lows of anxiety, insecurity, and instability, relationships are unlike any other life experience, and yet life just can’t be complete without them.
You’ve probably heard those cliché remarks before.
Relationships are never easy.
Relationships are work.
And while these things are certainly true, typically anything that is difficult or effortful leads to a more rewarding, fulfilling outcome.
And relationships are no exception.
But what about when going gets rough? Or even unbearable?
What if you and your partner have not just hit one bump in the road, but many?
How do you really know if your relationship is worth fighting for?
While there are no simple, straightforward answers to these questions, there are a few signs you can look for to see if your relationship really is worth fighting for.
12 Signs that Your Relationship is Worth Fighting For
1. You’ve always felt the freedom to be yourself around them. Few people in your life get to know the real, raw you, but your partner is one of them. They’re one of the only ones, if not the only, who knows all your quirky, weird habits, and just gets you. They’ve seen you dance around in your pajamas after your first cup of coffee in the morning. They’ve heard you sing Adele in the shower. They understand that you have a special, almost creepy obsession with everything Disney. Simply put: you aren’t ashamed to be the person you really are around them, and that is a rare, special relationship worth fighting for.
2. You still get that fluttery, butterflies feeling. Whether you’ve been apart all day, for a couple of weeks, or even if you took a “time out” after a massive fight, you still feel those butterflies fluttering around in your stomach when you finally see them. What does this mean, though? Still feeling emotions like these when you see your partner means that you’re still passionately invested in the relationship, and that it’s definitely worth fighting for.
3. You want to take those big, life-changing steps together. You and your partner have had countless solid talks about your future and “next steps” together, and you’re excited to go through those life events together. Whether it means starting a family together one day, adopting a pet, moving in together, or even getting engaged, you see yourself with this person for life, and you’re comforted to know that you’ll have their companionship along the way.
4. You’re more than just lovers; you’re each other’s best friend. As romantic as it is to have someone to be intimate with, you know a healthy, lasting relationship is one based on companionship. You and your partner aren’t just lovers – you’re best friends. No one knows you as well as they do, and vice versa. A relationship built solidly in friendship and trust is one that will truly last, and one that you should fight for.
5. You want to spend your days with them, even the most boring ones. There’s no one you’d rather spend time with, even if it’s time spent doing nothing. Whether you binge watch Netflix together for an afternoon, or even if you nap all day together on a Saturday, spending time with them is always worthwhile and comforting.
6. You can’t imagine them being with someone else (or you being with anyone else). It makes your heart crack a little to imagine your partner being with anyone else, and the thought of you being with anyone else is equally upsetting. It’s not just jealousy that you would feel; it would be a heart wrenching, overwhelming grief that would be more than challenging for you to cope with. If this is something you’ve thought about or experienced, then your love is one worth fighting for.
7. You still fundamentally align on your belief systems. No matter how life challenges the two of you, you both can still align on the same fundamental beliefs. Sure, the two of you may fight from time to time, but at the end of the day, you both can still agree on your core values.
8. Most of your fights revolve around the little stuff. Whether you fight rarely or often, the vast majority of your arguments are about the little things. How they “never” clean up the kitchen after a meal, how they fold towels, or how you roll your eyes at them may lead to some bickering, but you know that these quarrels don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. Arguments that revolve around differing fundamental values, or personal attacks at each other’s character, on the other hand, are a sign of deeper relationship issues.
9. You both are willing to invest the time and effort into the relationship. You both recognize that relationships take both time and effort, and you’re willing to invest both. Sure – it would be nice if everything were always easy, but in a way, the challenge and pursuit makes everything more rewarding and satisfying. So even if you and your partner have hit one (or many) rough patches that have made you question whether it’s all worth it, if at the end of the day you’re still wanting to try again, then it’s a relationship worth fighting for.
10. You can still make each other laugh. Maybe it’s how they can do spot-on impressions of Forrest Gump, how they can playfully pull you out of a sour mood, or how you know where exactly to tickle them, but you both know how to coax a smile or laugh out of each other. While this may sound like such a little thing to be able to do in a relationship, it means that you both recognize the softer, more vulnerable sides to each other. Such a connection is rare between two people, and a sign that your relationship is worth fighting for.
11. You both see your own shortcomings as self-improvement points. No one and nothing is perfect, and you both realize that your relationship is no exception to this rule. You both know where your areas for improvement lie, and you see them as opportunities for personal growth. While you don’t want to change each other, you both want to help each other be the best version of themselves. If you and your partner are still committed to helping each other grow personally and together as a couple, it’s worth it to give your relationship another try.
12. You love and accept them for who they are (and vice versa). Sure – we all may wish that our partner was a master pastry chef or that they loved shopping as much as we do (for our own selfish reasons), but at the end of the day, we love and accept them just as they are, and vice versa. You’ve never wanted to change the person you fell in love with, and you’re still attracted to those qualities that made you fall in love in the first place. You love them as they are, and you’re committed to being a part of their life.
For more signs to know whether your relationship is worth saving, check out this article.
