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Think about how you spend the majority of your time, and what your goal is when you start out a fresh, new day.
Is it finding fulfillment in your job? Spending time with your loved ones? Or planning your next adventure abroad?
Chances are that when you distill your goals down into what you really want, it’s finding happiness.
We are all in the pursuit of happiness. We spend our entire lives chasing after what makes us happy, or what we think will make us happy, sampling one experience after another in the hopes that it will finally give us the golden ticket to be truly happy.
While we may look to external sources to bring us happiness, deep down, we know that happiness is something that can only come from within ourselves.
And yet, we are often our greatest obstacles when it comes to letting ourselves be happy. We may convince ourselves that we don’t deserve to be happy, or that we’ll only fail if we try.
Toxic habits like these always come with a cost, whether it’s your health, your reputation, your relationships, and ultimately, your happiness.
If you’re wondering what bad habits may be holding you back from being truly happy, take a look at these top 8 unhealthy habits you must break to be happy.
8 Unhealthy Habits You Need to Break to be Happier
1. Waiting to be happy. Here’s the thing about being happy with your life: you don’t have to wait for it. Many of us (including myself) fall into the trap of thinking that certain things need to happen for us to actually be happy with our lives and ourselves. I’ll be happy when I lose 10 pounds. I’ll be happy when I make X amount of dollars. I’ll be happy when I finish this stressful project at work. We rely on time to make us happy, when instead we could already be leading happier, fuller lives simply by realizing that happiness is something that comes from within ourselves, and not something we should wait for.
2. Beating yourself up. Self-deprecating humor, self-criticisms, and telling yourself you’re not good enough are all ways in which you effectively bring yourself down and instantly lower your self-worth. For better or for worse, our self-talk largely determines how much we value ourselves, so if we constantly chatter to ourselves that we’re not good enough, we will believe it. Conversely, when you use self-talk positively, you have the power to overcome your self-doubts, and you rebuild a healthier, stronger self-image.
3. Not listening to what your body is trying to tell you. One huge unhealthy habit we often engage in is that we ignore what our bodies are trying to tell us. Whether we’re chronically stressed or sleep deprived, we may choose to overlook many of the symptoms that come with these conditions. Maybe you’re always pouring yourself another cup of coffee to “just make it through the day.” Or maybe you’re always popping Excedrin to fend off the afternoon headache that comes with your stress. Stop ignoring what your body is trying to tell you, and just listen to what your body needs. Whether it’s more sleep, more meditation, or more yoga, make the time to take care of your body; it’s the only one you’ll ever get!
4. Spending every spare moment on social media. There are a number of healthful benefits that come with doing a social media detox, and being happier is one of them. It’s true-you’ll actually be happier with less social media in your life! Too many of us have come to rely on social media as not just a simple pastime, but as a way of life. We get caught up in a cycle of comparing ourselves to others and keeping up with others’ lives, rather than focusing on our own. Take a break from social media if you can, or at the very least limit your usage to an hour every day. You’ll quickly find that less social media in your life will make you feel not only more confident about yourself, but also happier with your life.
5. Playing the blame game. When something goes wrong or the unexpected happens, it’s all too easy to blame everyone or everything else, rather than taking responsibility. Misfortunes happen to everyone; it’s not because you deserve it any more than someone else. It may seem like everyone else has it better than you do, but believe me, everyone is struggling in some way, just as you are.
6. Always saying “Yes” to everyone else, but “No” to you. If you’re a people pleaser by nature, then chances are that you say “Yes” far more often than you would like to. While it’s ok to say yes to some requests, saying yes to everyone’s demands every time is self-compromising and emotionally draining (not to mention time consuming). You’re never going to please everyone, so it’s a futile endeavor to keep trying to make everyone happy. Stop saying yes to everyone else but you. People may not like it when you turn them down, but they’ll respect you (and your time) more.
7. Wasting time on people that don’t respect you. Whether you’re in a toxic relationship, or you have so-called friends that habitually stand you up, stop making time for people that don’t respect you. Life is far too short to waste on unhealthy, toxic relationships, and you deserve far better, rewarding relationships that should leaving you filling fulfilled, rather than drained.
8. Letting your fear of failure hold you back. We all have our own fears of failure that we grapple with, sometimes on a daily basis. Since the time of our ancestors long ago, humans have always been wired to feel fear. It’s that little voice that keeps you from getting too close to the edge of a cliff at the Grand Canyon. It’s what keeps you from gunning through a red light at a large intersection. Fear like this is normal, and even healthy. However, letting your fears grow into an insurmountable barrier that keeps you from doing what you really want to do is crippling. Learn how to talk down your self-doubts, and identify what it is that you’re really afraid of. You’ll be surprised by how much you can accomplish when your fears don’t get in the way.
For more tips on how to break engrained habits, check out this article.
